Is a broken heart fixable?
by leonwriter2
Summary: What should have happened before Charlie was shot.
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys I had forgotten my login details for my original account so here is the continuation of the story that i had originally posted as LeonWriter.

Hope you like it!

Chapter One

'Oh please stop!'

Joey jolted awake and staring at her wall opposite her bed. She was sitting upright and panting wildly at the nightmare she had just experienced. It was a recurring one that broke her heart slowly and painfully more and more each day. Ever since she left the bay she had a giant knot in her heart. For a long time she thought it was the pain from being hurt and feeling useless and not good enough for the woman she loved so dearly and deeply. The woman that she had entrusted herself for the first time had left herself open to see her heart torn apart for the whole of the bay to see and know about. It had been hard enough with the issues of dealing with Robbo and trusting others especially after how her own brother had treated her after he found out about her sexuality. Though for Charlie she would have given up the world to be with her. The little that she had to forsake and held dear she would have sacrificed, even working on the boats.

Joey clambered out of bed and made her way over to the small sink at the window and washed her face and neck with the cold water. As it soothed her skin more thoughts flooded her mind of how even a simple look from Charlie could send her heart a flutter. The smell of her perfume made her made her nearly collapse with the need to taste her. The smell was so intense and amazing that for some reason she couldn't help herself but feel the desperate need to touch some part of her or at least have contact with her.  
Those eyes seemed to be staring back at her from the mirror, and now with the image of Charlie in her mind she could feel water droplets fall down her face and couldn't tell if they were tears or not. The neon lights outside the window beside her flashed and buzzed annoyingly.

'I can't escape her! God Charlie why did you do this to me?'

The next morning Joey headed down to her appointment. She was sitting down in an office filled with certificates and diploma's that unnerved her deeply. She had been seeing the same psychologist for the past four months. For the first two she cried heading the night before, walking there, during and after the session. She knew she had made progress but she had still not been able to shift her visions of Charlie, good or bad. This troubled her.

'So Joey what Charlie appeared to you last night then?'

The young attractive man sat there listening intently as Joey stared out of the window thinking of the woman she loved so much.

'Why can't I hate her? Why can't I say no or stop her invading my mind?' She asked exasperatedly.

He sat forward and put his pad and pen down on the table in front of him.

'What do you think that you really need in order to let go, move on or…'

'Her!' The word was out before she could think.

Joey double blinked and looked over at him. His face had fallen and his eyes and his mouth were slightly open. When his thoughts returned to him he sat back and placed his fingertips together and drummed them together.

'Well I think no matter what, you should try to make contact with her and find out what you need to know to do get on without the torture you put yourself through!'

'What? Really?' Joey's voice broke at the thought.

She stood up and paced and turned back to him and continued to pace again.

'And what do I say to her when I see her? Hey Charlie don't know if you remember me but we were in love and you broke my heart and I know you haven't thought twice about me since I left after you cheated on me but hey what do you think about talking about my feelings that I still harbour for you?' Joey finally took a breath.

'Well I wouldn't exactly take that angle but…'

Joey moved to the door.

'I don't know that I could even say anything in front of her without crumbling and making a fool out of myself.

Joey left and ran to the harbor that she had not been near since docking after leaving summer bay. She looked across the water as the sun reflected off the water and wondered what Charlie was doing. If she had ever thought about her since she left.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Charlie woke with a start. Brax had left for a few weeks for a job and Charlie had a bad feeling about the job. He had become increasingly secretive as tensions rose in the bay. With everyone knowing that she and Brax were together things had been tough. The area superior had grilled her and he had been keeping tabs on her work and double-checking her reports. She had never been so stressed about being with someone that she was questioning whether being with him was even worth it. Ruby was having issues at school with bullies teasing her about her mother.

Charlie pulled herself into a sitting position and rubbed her aching neck. As she rubbed she looked out of her bedroom window and spotted the dock. She sighed heavily and stared longingly. A rush of feelings and thoughts flooded her mind. It had been a few years since the only person that she had ever loved and totally and truly loved her had left. It was the worst time of her life when Joey left. She knew as the trawler pulled away from the jetty that she would never be as happy or as loved again. Despite being with Brax and her other brief relationships after Joey no one even came close to making her feel a fraction of what she had felt.

She felt slightly sick as she continued to stare at the jetty. There had been times recently that when Charlie couldn't sleep she would leave the house and walk down to stand in the same spot as she had stood with Joey and received her last kiss. That last kiss not only felt like a goodbye kiss but one that said I'm never coming back. The trawler had returned a year ago and Charlie had been given the heads up of its arrival into the bay. She had sped down to the bay and abandoned the car and nearly fell into the water as she came to a hault. The anxiety of waiting for it to dock, when everyone else but Joey left she ventured on and found the captain. He had informed her that Joey had gotten off four days earlier and headed out on her own. He knew no more than that despite her angry questioning. She retreated back to her car and drove away she drove till she couldn't see and cried till she couldn't breathe.

Recently when she had been abducted, during that ordeal what no one knew was that she cried out several times for Joey to save her. When Brax finally found her there was a part of her that was disappointed to find that it wasn't Joey who had pulled the door open and rescued her. When faced with the same predicament again Charlie had no other thought but to shoot the person who was about to kill both her and Brax. Though what she had never told anyone was that in her head it was Joey laid on the floor and Robbo standing over her. Charlie had been living with guilt over Joey and now Brax. She knew he loved her deeply but she desperately wanted to explain to him that she lived with a torn and sad soul. Her heart was empty and heavy. That every morning she woke she was disappointed to not see the beautiful outline of her Joey.

Charlie would give anything to see her again and talk to her. Even if Joey still hated her, just to let her say how deeply sorry she is and how much she loved her.

Charlie was done feeling sorry for herself and decided to go for another walk to the jetty to soothe her head.

Charlie arrived at the end of the Jetty and sat down on the edge of the wooden walk way and removed her sandals. She looked out to the opposite horizon to which Joey had disappeared. It was too hard not to cry when she reminisced.

Charlie's mobile rang and her heart skipped a beat until she saw that it was the station calling.

'Charlie Buckton…Yes sure I'll be there in fifteen.'

Charlie ran off back to the house to change.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

As Charlie had driven off she hadn't see n the emerging image of a taxi coming ov er the horizon. Charlie left the house i n a panic to get to the station. On her way she passed the bay and with her wind ow rolled down she let the light breeze fill her mind. The smell of the sea air always reminded her of Joey, though she had never admitted it. For a split secon d she closed her eyes then opened them a gain and looked to her right and suddenl y the most beautiful image appeared on t he beach walking along the sand. She sud denly felt like for the first time in ye ars she was able to breathe again despit e having her breath taken away. Charlie looked forward to see the road and then abandoned the car in the middle of the r oad. She nearly choked herself trying to get out of the car whilst wrestling wit h her seat belt. She raced back to the s pot where she had seen Joey from the roa d, only to find that she was not there. Charlie continued to run down to the wal kway before the sand. She quickly scanne d the area though much to her excited he arts dismay. The adrenaline that had bee n pumping frantically through was now sl owing to quickly for her body to cope. S he stumbled and had to lean against the wooden post for support.

"Joey! Oh Joey why couldn't it have been you?"

"Charlie? Is everything ok?" Said Alf as he put two bin bags out.

Charlie pulled herself to her feet and s traightened herself. She smiled and wave d over.

"Everything is fine Alf. Just needed air and got a stich in my side."

Charlie walked off briskly to her car to head to the station that she should hav e already been at by now.

Charlie pulled away disheartened by the vision of Joey only turning out to be a vision and not a reality. Not realizing that she was being watched very closely. 

At the station Charlie was escorted stra ight into the interviewing room where sh e was questioned about her involvement o nce again with Brax and his brothers. Th ree hours later Charlie emerged from the assault of questioning feeling fragile and totally drained. The last person she wanted to see or talk to was Brax. For all that she cared for Brax her sudden i nflux of thoughts recently on the annive rsary of Joey's leaving. Charlie fell in to her car seat and locked the doors and sighed heavily. She unbuttoned the firs t couple of buttons on her shirt feeling she was being strangled.

She pulled out from the station and drov e off heading home. She drove past the b ay once again just on the off chance tha t she could see her apparition again of her Joey. It didn't happen. By the time she had arrived home she felt an enormou s weight weighing down on her chest. She fumbled with her keys and her breathing as she opened the door. She had the fun niest sensation that she was being watch ed as she looked at the hair on her arms standing on edge.

She looked behind her and managed to cat ch the glimpse of a shadow running off.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Joey had held onto her bag of possessions as she had ran. Clutching at her chest having seen Charlie drive past her whilst she took a walk on the beach. She thought that if she had covered herself with a baseball cap and hoodie that she wouldn't have been seen. Though she had stopped for a while once reaching the bay and used the hoodie to lie down on. When she had gotten to her feet she was so warm that she couldn't bare putting the hoodie back on. However her cap had stayed on the entire time. This of course was another reason why Charlie spotting her from her car on the road shocked her. She had seen Charlie's car driving down towards the bay and had slowed her walking to catch a glimpse of her as she passed. Joey stopped and inhaled quickly at capturing a glimpse of the woman she loved so deeply. Though when Charlie turned and spotted her, then nearly crashing the car caused Joey a flurry of panic filled thoughts. She wasn't ready to speak to Charlie yet. She hadn't thought through whether or not she was going to talk to her or not. Joey ran off and hid in amongst the trees, dropping her bag at the foot of the tree and lying down flat on the ground with it. She watched Charlie in her sexy cop outfit that she loved to see her in and getting out of. She knew rightly that Charlie had ran out of her car thinking that she had seen Joey. Joey couldn't argue that to see Charlie's excited face fall to a look of despair when she couldn't find Joey anywhere around didn't give her a flutter of joy in her tummy. In fact had Charlie only but looked a little harder Joey hadn't gotten completely out of sight and she had dropped her baseball cap on the sand in a panicked run for cover. This was not like Charlie, Charlie was always on the ball and noticed everything. Or at least her Charlie did. She watched Charlie sink down holding onto the wooden post for leverage as she tried to regain her breathing. When Alf spoke to her she noticed Charlie flinch for a moment before waving and heading off again. Seeing Charlie in that state of breathlessness and despair was hurting Joey. Though before she could react Charlie had driven off.

Later on after Charlie had left Joey re-emerged from the trees and headed gingerly back out onto the sand. This time she would walk past a few familiar faces, which cut her deeply not being able to say hi to them. She had so longed for a familiar face over the past number of years since she had left. Though she knew all too well that if she was to do this right or even at all the only person she should approach first is Charlie. She didn't want her finding out Joey was in town and hadn't come to see her first or at all.

Joey wandered around the bay and admired the changes that had taken place. She was sad to see that things had changed since she was there and wished that she could have been apart of it all. Darkness was falling and Joey was feeling hungry. She headed out to the new diner that she had never seen before. She was very apprehensive about going in and ordering from possibly someone who knew her. She approached the counter and a bright bubbly blonde approached her.

"Oh hi there, what can I get you?"

Joey momentarily froze and gazed over her shoulder.

"Are you ok? Do you need something?"

"Can I have a sandwich to go please? Ham Salad with a slice of ham on each slice of bread and the salad in the centre. White bread please with mayo."

Marilyn smiled and nodded.

"Five minutes if you want to wait over there."

Joey took a seat over by the door so she could keep an eye on who was coming in and to give her easy access to leave if she needed. There were a few familiar faces but none of them seemed to notice her, which this time around she much preferred.

In the kitchen Irene was making up the other customers orders when she spotted Marilyn making up a take out sandwich. She stopped working on her order and watched with great intrigue as to what she was doing. She knew this order. It was an order she had made before on many occasions.

"Love, who are you making that for?" Irene asked.

"Oh this poor girl out there, she looks lost or frightened. She was very specific about the order and now I've forgotten the order because I'm talking too much." Marilyn put down the knife of butter and pondered was it to have butter and mayo or just mayo.

Irene stepped in and finished it off.

"How did you know what the order was?"

"Let's just call it a hunch. I'll take this out." Marilyn looked perplexed as she watched Irene walk out with the take out sandwich.

Irene walked over to the door where she had seen Joey's figure sitting. Irene couldn't believe her eyes. She kept calm and approached with care.

"If you want this I suggest you meet me outside." Irene whispered as she walked past.

Joey jumped and felt her heartbeat pounding through her chest, threatening to burst out in front of her. She didn't know what to do. Joey looked around and knew that she couldn't really go anywhere except out the way she had walked as Marilyn was now watching with great fascination. Joey stood mechanically and headed for the door. Irene was waiting just down from the steps with her back to her. Joey contemplated walking the other direction away from Irene where she couldn't be seen.

"Joey Collins don't you dare walk away from me." Irene muttered in a low voice.

Joey took a deep breath and walked towards Irene.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Joey sat on the bench beside Irene and ran her fingers over the packaging, unsure whether or not to start eating or wait for Irene to say something. Irene just gazed out to the water waiting for Joey to speak.

"Thanks for the sandwich." Joey finally said.

"Your welcome." Irene rubbed at her head. "Joey, you know what I'm going to ask and tell you so why don't you start talking."

Joey placed the sandwiches down and made to stand up and leave.

"Joey, you came back here and knew you would face this! Now would you not rather talk this out with me first before you go to see her. You know that if you don't think it through then you will end up saying things to her that you don't mean."

Joey looked back at Irene. She knew of course that Irene was right. She would just go into a conversation all guns blazing and Charlie and she would never resolve anything. Joey sat back down and let Irene open the sandwiches and place on in her hand.

"I know of only one person who would ask for sandwiches made like this!" Irene examined the sandwiches.

"You knew it was me from my order?" Joey asked aghast.

"Yes Love. Now start from the beginning. How are you? What have you been up to?"

Joey Sighed and took a large bite of her sandwich, chewed then swallowed.

"I'm good, well ok, well…I don't know. When my trawler was making its way back here I decided to get off and work my way round the country. It's been hard, lots of cold nights sleeping rough and no food. Though I have found a job and I now have a little apartment that I rent out cheaply. It only has one room and a toilet. It does me. So what's been happening here?"

Joey asked this not realizing that Irene was about to be blatantly honest with her.

Once Irene had filled her in on everything that had been happening Joey had lost her appetite and was now sitting staring off into space. Irene had been trying to talk to her Gently especially when Charlie came into the topic of conversation. Though Joey only grew more anxious and panicked.

"Joey would you say something? What are you going to do now? Are you back to stay or not? Are you going to talk to Charlie?"

"Why bother if she's that loved up with Brax? I don't know what I'm going to do to be honest. I had come back hoping to move on from things that have plagued my mind since I left here, but I'm sure I've only made things worse by coming back and finding out all that Charlie has been up to and with who!" Joey got to her feet.

"You need to talk to her Joey. I don't think she's been the same since you left. She has made a lot of horrible decisions and she has not been happy for a long time. She puts on a great front, which you know all too well that she can do. But I've seen her happy Joey, and that was with you. If you are not going to talk to her or even try to make things better between you both even on a platonic level then you need to think about whether being here would be good for either of you."

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. You both meant so much to each other and went through so much. Do you really think she has ever forgiven herself for any of it? She has had one disastrous relationship after another and now her own daughter isn't really speaking to her."

"Her daughter?"

"Oh Love, you really have no idea what that poor girl went through after you left. Her world went into melt down."

Irene continued to explain to Joey whom she had to repeatedly calm and insist upon allowing her to finish the story before she reacted. Joey listened for over an hour as Irene explained and then saw that it was getting darker.

"Look love it's up to you but please think about what I've said to you. Ok! It was really good seeing you again. Lets have another chat soon ok!" Irene hugged Joey and walked back to the diner.

Joey found herself walking in a direction that she knew all too well.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Charlie sat nursing a glass of red wine, swirling the glass and allowing herself to be mesmerized by the patterns on the glass. She sat on the couch facing the other one and her imagination began to wander again. She could see Joey and her sitting on the couch in their PJ's watching TV. Joey was hinting at when they could finally start telling people about them. Charlie shivered as she recalled her reaction to others knowing and the look and reaction on Joey's face.

What she wouldn't do to have that moment again and do it all so differently. The house was empty and Charlie really wished that someone would come home and keep her company.

Meanwhile Joey had been hiding in the bushes outside trying to catch glimpses of her loved one. She found a little bit of bravery within her and dug deep to get closer to watch Charlie on the couch. Charlie had pulled out a book from the shelf behind her on the couch. Inside Charlie had torn a back panel off and lifted out something and was examining it closely. She was keeping it well protected after setting down her glass of red wine. Joey longed to join her on the couch with a glass like they used to do. There was something different about Charlie now, and Joey couldn't put her finger on it. Irene couldn't possibly have meant that Charlie missed her so much that she hadn't been herself since Joey left. Charlie began stroking the piece of paper with a sad smile on her lips, threatening to deepen.

Charlie shook herself and moved slowly to the kitchen bringing with her the now empty glass and the piece of paper. That piece of paper was placed on the table in front of her as Charlie sat down with her back to the window next to the bottle of wine. Still unaware that Joey was there Charlie began to talk to the picture.

"Why did I have to fuck it al up Joey? Why? What can I do to fix this? I don't want to be unhappy anymore, I'm sick of this! Sick of the emptiness I feel without…"

Charlie trailed off and began to sob. Joey stood up to get a better look at the picture. It was a picture taken not longer before Joey left the bay of Ruby, Charlie and herself. It was taken down by Alf's boat. Joey hadn't realized that when she had stood to get a better view she had also stepped into the light and was now reflecting off the picture. When Charlie looked back at the picture and saw the image of Joey almost moving she threw it down then picked it back up. Joey hadn't moved as she had not become aware of what was happening with her standing where she was. Charlie noticed that it wasn't her imagination and that the picture itself wasn't doing a Hogwarts trick and moving on its own. Charlie slowly got to her feet and began to turn around when Ruby came through the other door.

"Mum your never guess what the rumour about town is!"

"Ruby!" Charlie shouted disheartened having quickly turned round and checked outside and no one there.

"Sorry just thought you would like to know!" Ruby made to walk off but was caught in the arm by Charlie.

"Sorry Rubes come and sit and tell me. Please. You just scared me that's all."

Ruby was highly suspicious though sat down anyway. As she sat down she noticed a piece of paper on the floor.

"Whats this?" she asked opening it. "Oh My God how did you know!"

"It's nothing just something I found…Wait know what?"

"Come on Charlie you are looking at her picture!" Charlie looked at Ruby perplexed. "You don't know! Charlie…Joey's back in Summer Bay!"

Charlie dropped the two glass bottles of soda on the floor causing them to smash. Charlie didn't even flinch. Charlie ran to her daughters side who was now on her feet looking terrified for Charlie's feet though they hand gotten hurt in the accident.

"Joey…My Joey…Joey Collins is back! Where is she? Did you see her? How is she?"

"Wow Charlie slow down!"

"No! I slowed things down enough in the past that I ruined everything with her! Where is she Rubes? I need to find her."

"Charlie I don't know but shouldn't we tidy…"

Charlie grabbed her coat from the back of the chair and threw on a pair of flip flops at the door.

"Ruby stay here till I get back. I need to find her."

"Oh don't worry bout the mess, sure I'll clean it…not like I have stuff to do!" Charlie was already in the car and driving out onto the road.

Joey had hidden in the bushes and heard and seen everything. She knew Charlie wouldn't stop till she found her and it was probably time to come out of hiding.

Joey moved to leave forgetting that Ruby was still in the house.

"Joey!" Joey froze to the spot. "Joey have you been there the whole time?" She didn't answer. Ruby dropped the dustpan and threw her arms around a still shocked Joey. Joey melted in the young girls arms. It was so nice to feel wanted and missed by someone she really cared about. "Joey so much has happened since you left!"

"I need to find Charlie and talk to her first Ruby. But I will come back and talk to you and catch up…ok?" Ruby nodded and gave her one last hug. Joey ran off into the darkness.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven

Charlie had ran down to the beach wandering around suppressing the urge to call out for Joey. Charlie slowed as she came to the point in the sand that she had seen Joey standing only hours before. She couldn't believe that she had actually seen her and that she had not just imagined it. She cursed and scolded herself for not looking more closely for her. Joey could have been hurt or running from someone or scared and Charlie just gave up and walked off. She sat in the sand, tired and breathless from the long run from the house. As she sat there listening to the water behind her she reminisced about the run that she and Joey had shared before. Charlie smiled and closed her eyes thinking about Joey and the fun they had. She knew that she had always loved Joey from that first moment they spoke to each other in the storeroom of the surf club. Charlie at first had put it down to caring for another person but she had never brought them home to stay or given up her room or bed for anyone else. Joey was and had always been someone more special and meaningful to her than just a friend or fling.

Charlie sat in the sand wondering if staying in the one spot would ensure that Joey would find her. Did Joey want to find her? Had she not come back to find her or speak to her? Had she come back just to gather the rest of her things and leave? Had she met someone else? Charlie felt sick at the thought of the last point. Her Joey in the arms of another woman made Charlie very jealous and angry. Though she knew that she had no right to be. She had hurt Joey worse than anyone else in the world after promising her to never do anything to upset her. She had thought only of herself throughout their relationship and been totally selfish and it only through loved and being with Joey that she had known what love was. It had scared Charlie and ever since Joey left she knew she could never love another as much or as passionately as Joey or be loved by someone. Joey was always so kind and considerate. Never pushy or demanding, just always there for her, respectful and generous. She had been generous in everything she did even love making.

The cool air was crisp and nippy on her cheeks. She hadn't realized just how long she had been sitting there until she noticed the moon dancing in its reflection on the water. She pulled her knees in tight and began to sob quietly.

Joey had known only two places Charlie would have ran to see her at this time of the night, the dock or the beach. Joey had swung by the dock already and was now turning the corner towards the beach. The outline of a beautiful woman sat on the beach in front of her. Joey slowed as she came to a bench and wanted to take a few moments to take in Charlie again and about what she was going to say to her. The whole time she had been in Summer Bay she hadn't thought about what she was going to say to her. She watched as Charlie pulled her legs into her chest. It was obvious she was now crying at the waters edge as the moonlight licked around her elegant features.

Before she could think Joey was on her feet and had removed her shoes and was moving swiftly to Charlie's side. She attempted twice to reach her hand out to touch Charlie and comfort her, but she wanted to relish the close calm proximity to Charlie. Charlie could sense someone was close to her, she stopped crying and calmed slightly and tilted her head slightly. She noticed a familiar right foot with three small moles like Mickey Mouse's head.

"Where you not going to come talk to me?" Charlie asked without turning to face Joey. Joey was a little shocked by the question.

"Well…I…Yes."

"Then why did everyone else in the bay know you were back except me?"

"They don't all know. Plus I needed time to think."

"Oh"

Joey reached her hand to Charlie's shoulder and tried to turn her. Charlie tried to resist at first then she turned fast and grabbed Joey into a hug. Joey kept her arms outstretched as Charlie held onto her for dear life. Joey began to melt in her arms as Charlie's fingers clung tighter to her shirt.

"Oh Joey! Please hold me…If you ever loved me please just hold me for a little bit. I need you to hold me. Please!" Charlie's plea made Joey well up with tears.

Joey wrapped her hands around Charlie's slender back. All the talking that needed to happen between them both could wait; she knew they would need to get her shock return over with first. Charlie was too emotional to have a rational chat with at this moment in time. Charlie began to sob hard into Joey's shoulder, Joey tried to hold it together for her sake but it was too hard holding Charlie and all the emotions flooding through her. Joey pulled Charlie closer to her and into a more comfortable position. Joey folded her legs around her and began rocking them both from side to side to try to soothe Charlie's crying. It began to take effect but Charlie was still upset.


	8. Chapter 8

Enjoy!

Chapter Eight

Charlie and Joey woke early lying in each others arms having only managed to move out of sight into an alcove in one of the sand dunes. It sat at an angle shielded from view of the world. Joey was already awake and watching Charlie who was cradled in her arms. Charlie was so beautiful and sweet when she slept. Joey had almost forgotten how amazing it was to just watch her sleep.

Charlie stirred and rubbed at her eyes. They had used their coats to cover them in the sand, covering their heads from any wayward sand or adverse heat and sun. Charlie noted that she was lying still in Joey's arms and began running her hand along Joey's opposite arm. Joey watched her closely. A rush of emotions came flooding back to her of how it used to fell waking up next to Charlie and the silent moments in each other's arms as they relished just being together. She had made her feel so special, so loved and for the first time ever attractive. Charlie looked up into Joey's eyes and whispered.

"Morning." She smiled softly waiting on Joey to respond.

Joey was too nervous and apprehensive to respond. What did this all mean? They had only spent the night holding each other, nothing more. This did not make up for anything, not by a long shot. However what it did do was allow Joey to see Charlie again for the beautiful woman she is, knowing this would only serve to help her attempt to talk to her.

"Morning."

Charlie turned around to get closer and deeper into Joey's neck for a snuggle. Joey could smell her intoxicating smell coupled with her ever-unforgettable shampoo scent. Joey looked down Charlie's back at her hands as her fingers traced over Charlie's back and looked further to see the sumptuous bum that Joey never grew tired of looking at or holding. Charlie had been wearing shorts and Joey couldn't stop looking at them after she had passed over the bum.

Charlie pulled back slightly, causing their faces to sit very close to each other.

"Thank you." Charlie whispered even more softly.

"What for?" Joey matched her tone.

"For holding me through the shock and then the night."

"You held me first." She pointed out with a smile. Charlie blushed then attempted to sit up. Instinctively Joey pulled her tighter and held onto her. "Can we just wait a little bit like this before the perfectness of last night disappears?" Charlie smiled with her head in Joey's shoulder and nodded. Charlie snaked her arms around the back of Joey and held on tightly. Joey took in a deep breath wondering was it a mistake to keep it going in case Charlie thought everything had been forgiven and they could pick up where they left off. Then a sudden more terrifying thought came into her mind. What if Charlie was truly over her and that all she wanted was to be friends with her. She couldn't do that, she couldn't pretend that she didn't love her and that she would ever be happy watching Charlie with someone else.

Charlie could sense that Joey had become a little tense and stiff suddenly. Not wanting to push her to talk too soon out of fear of what she might say Charlie tried an old trick that always settled her Joey. Charlie took her index finger and began lightly tracing shapes on Joey's back. She gave it a few moments before looking up at Joey's face; her expression worried Charlie at first. Joey had her eyes closed and her brow was deeply furrowed. Just as Charlie was about to stop Joey's expression began to relax and her body ease into a more relaxed state. Charlie smiled happily knowing that she could at least do this for the woman she loved. Joey opened her eyes to see a wonderful smiled etched on Charlie's face. Joey automatically lent in to kiss her then when her thoughts returned she stopped just inches from Charlie's lush red lips. She could feel Charlie's breath on her lips and looked at her eyes. Charlie's eyes were closed looking forward to this kiss, yet when Joey had stopped leaning in Charlie daren't open her eyes. She was terrified of the look on Joey's face or what she might say. Charlie decided to get the first words out between them before Joey walked away.

"I was only trying to calm you. I wasn't looking or expecting anything."

Joey sat back and allowed her eyes to reexamine Charlie. They were still under the shelter of the coats but it was just like they had been before. Always hidden away never able to share a moment openly and with the world.

"Thanks, but I'm far from calm." Joey tried to stand and felt Charlie turn to lie more directly on top of her.

"Please Joey, don't run off. Don't leave me again. I can't take it!" Charlie was sobbing uncontrollably. Joey was shocked by just how sudden and abruptly she began to cry. "Joey, please, please don't leave me. I need you! You have no idea what its been like without you…" Charlie was beside herself with grief over the thought of Joey leaving her again. Joey was so shocked by Charlie's openness and submission of need for her to stay.

The phrase "I need you." Kept replaying in her head. Why did she need her? What was happening? Why was she so broken and terrified. Joey forced herself out of Charlie's arms, which was a struggle as Charlie fought desperately to hold onto her. Once free Joey sat up and allowed the coats to fall behind her allowing the sun to envelope them. Charlie curled up in a ball sobbing, begging Joey to hold her again. Joey watched the woman she loved cry as she got to her feet. Charlie's tears subsided briefly as she watched to see what Joey was about to do.

"I'm hungry. What about you?" Joey extended her hand to Charlie who was in total shock after convincing herself that Joey was about to walk off without another thought towards her.

Charlie took Joeys hand and allowed herself to be pulled up to her feet. The girls were now dangerously close to each other. So close in fact that their stomachs were touching. They gazed into each others eyes for a few long seconds before joey raised her hand and began to wipe away the tears from Charlie's face. Charlie melted at the softness of Joey's hands caressing her and raising her own hands she cupped Joey's to her cheek and held it there. Joey eventually pulled her hand free gently and began to walk towards the diner. Charlie ran along side her to keep up and as they walked and smiled at each other some deliberate grazing of hands as their arms swung along side them, teasing at a quick clasp of hands.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

Charlie stopped outside the diner and grabbed Joey's hand.

"Don't tell me…You don't want to be seen with me!" Joey said almost hissing at her.

"No, no Joey." She closed the gap between the pair. "I just wanted one final second with you before we had all eyes and tongues wagging about us seen together again. Is that ok?" Joey felt a flush of guilt pass over her.

Joey with one hand pulled Charlie in for a hug and whispered in her ear.

"I'm sorry, I just panicked." Charlie squeezed her and the pair walked in side by side.

Joey sat down nearest the window so she had something to focus on other than the immediate stares. She had at least walked in the day before shielded by her hat. This time she was hatless and with Charlie. Charlie had made the order at the counter and returned to her seat opposite Joey. Charlie could see a number of prying eyes and wondered if any of them had contact with Brax. She didn't care at this point what he would think of her sitting or talking with Joey. She watched Joey taking in the sights again of the bay and smiling. She was over come with a mixture of emotions sitting watching her. She wanted desperately to know what she was thinking, how she was feeling and above all what was going to happen next. Was Joey going to stay or leave again?

Joey knew she was being watched and liked it. She wanted that to last as long as possible. The quiet time between them was good to allow them both to get used to being around each other again. Joey hadn't known how or if she would be able to be in close proximity to Charlie ever again but after holding her all night and for a good part of the early morning she was happy to say that being around Charlie at least was not going to be painful.

Irene brought over their order. Joey had no idea what Charlie had ordered but she was very hungry. Irene arrived with a large tray. Joey near fainted at the mass of food on offer for just the pair.

"On the house love, a little welcome back pressie!" Irene winked at Joey and left.

"Charlie, did you?"

"No, I told her I would pay later but she insisted that it was on the house for you. I swear!" Joey nodded then rubbed her head.

"Urgh I need a shower to get this sand outta my hair." Charlie giggled.

"You can shower at mine, if you want." Joey raised her head and looked at Charlie. "Oh no, no I didn't mean it…Well you know not that…I want to…But…"

Joey burst out laughing watching Charlie for the first time become properly flustered. Charlie blushed and pretended to huff.

"It's not funny." Charlie's attempt at pouting was hysterical and cute.

"Come on it so is. Look eat up and then I can slag you later." Charlie perked up a little. Although it wasn't concrete Joey had suggested that she would see her later on, she would see Joey after breakfast. Elated at the thought Charlie began to eat her brekkie.

Once the girls had completely stuffed themselves to the point of being nearly sick they took their water bottles and left the diner for a walk. Nothing was said between them as they walked. For a little while they walked with an obvious gap between them but the further they walked the closer they became. Their hands once again began to touch as they neared the dock they had come to know so well. At the end of the walkway sat a familiar boat…the blaxland. The girls smiled at each other at the memories that the boat held for them. Joey stopped walking and having spotted a bench she walked silently over to it. Charlie stood and watched her unsure whether she was to join her or not. Joey sat down and was surprised to see Charlie waiting to be asked to join her. It was sweet to see this nervous side of Charlie. Charlie sat down and found herself looking directly at the front of the Blaxland where she realized that she was falling in love with Joey.

Charlie smiled then remembered how she had left poor Joey standing alone on the boat as she ran off. Joey turned and lent one arm over the back of the bench.

"I didn't blame you that day for running off on me."

"Why? I left you standing there. God what must that alone have done to you?"

"Charlie, I don't want to have to examine every infinite detail of what happened. That part was insignificant in terms of hurt caused, but if you must know I actually felt happy." Charlie looked puzzled. "I saw in your eyes that you had feelings for me, you showed me your soul that day." Charlie looked away ashamed at the out come of what had eventually happened. "Charlie, before I left that boat to find you I swore that I would do everything to make it work with you, but only if you felt the same. I also let you down. I walked away too easily. I was too hurt by what you had done to see that you had also been hurt by the allegations Brett had made against you and that we had been separated. You had been suspended and the entire bay knew it. Knew our business Charlie and you were still struggling to come to terms with your sexuality and I pushed you too hard. I had known for years I liked women, you had only just discovered this!"

"Joey why are you being so understanding about all of this? I hurt you so so badly. I betrayed you, betrayed us and all that we had built with each other. I was ready to declare openly that I love you and yet a little alcohol and a woman trafficking moron taunts me and I feel that I need to prove a point. Joey do you know I threw up the whole way home that night and slept in my car in the driveway. I knew I couldn't see you but I needed to be as close as I could to you. I cried all night about what I had done. When I got the call about being able to see you again I have to admit but I broke the speed limit getting home. Then the look in your eyes when you found out, that still haunts me to this day. I haven't had a full nights sleep since you left."

Joey couldn't believe this was the same woman she had fallen in love with. Charlie was normally so closed off and strong. This woman was so broken. Joey had to yet again suppress the urge to throw her arms around Charlie, despite the fact that it was breaking her heart to see Charlie like this. She had half expected Charlie to put up a fight or stay strong at least but she had folded before anything had really been said.

"Joey, my life is…I need to tell you something before we go any further."

"Is everything ok? Are you ok?"

"I'm better now that you are here but things have happened recently that I'm not proud of and I think I'm in self-destruct mode. I need to tell you about Ruby."

"What? Is she sick? Is she…"

"Well she's been diagnosed with Diabetes but that's not the only thing I needed to tell you…"

"If its about her being your daughter then I already know." Charlie nearly fell off the bench in shock.

"How?"

"Irene, I bumped into her and she thought it would help us if she told me so that when you and I came to talk through our stuff that all of this would already be known and that we wouldn't be bombarded with information. She was only trying to help, so pleased don't be angry with her. I pushed her for the information."

Charlie looked out over the water unsure of what to think. Yes she was happy that Joey knew and that she wasn't upset with her for not saying. Though it was her information to tell.

"It's a small town Charlie and to be honest Irene was one of our few supporters when we got together. Please don't be mad with her I really had to push her. I told her it would help us."

"Help us. Joey do you think there could be an us?" Joey shook her head.

"I don't know Charlie. You are with someone else and rumour is he's going to propose to you soon. I don't want to break up a marriage."

"There wouldn't be one. Joey I have only ever wanted you. Joey, I don't know how to tell you this but Brax is not the nice guy that people think he is…I'm sure you were filled in about my abduction."

"Yes and I'm not sure why you chose to stay with him!"

"Joey I was so scared I didn't know what to do. When the door to the container opened I wished that it had been you that had found me not him. I wanted you and only you since you left. I tried to move on when you didn't come back but I can't Joey. I'm really not joking. I feel like I can finally breathe again with you back and sitting here with me. Last night, god last night meant so much to me Joey, I slept soundly all night with you protecting me."

"Charlie, there is still a lot to talk about and sort out."

"But if you let it, we can sort this out."

"And what about him?"

"Gone! Finished. I just want you."

"Just like that you would end a relationship."

"Joey I wouldn't call what Brax and I had a relationship."

"Then what would you call it? And would you be ready to be with me? What is the difference between then and now?" Joey asked as her heart thumped wildly.

"I would call it a mistake and a soul destroyer. He ripped apart everything that I knew about myself and that my father had taught me. I don't know myself now having been with him. But having been with him and Angelo taught me that there is no one in the world like you to be loved by. I have been ready since I ran down to stop you getting on that trawler and leaving me to declare that I love you, that I want to be with you and that you are the best kisser and lover I have ever had."

Joey blushed as Charlie began discussing intimacy with her. To think that Charlie had held her so highly was amazing to hear. Joey knew that Charlie was way out of her league but she also had to weigh up the hurt.

"Then what was I?"

"Life, Air, Love, Joy, Happiness, Finding myself at last. I had never known who I really was or what I really wanted. I just worked so damn hard to please others that I didn't know what it was to do something for me. That's another reason why I struggled when I realized I had fallen in love with you."

"And how do you feel now?"

"I'd rather show you!" Joey gulped hard as Charlie closed the gap between them.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter Ten

Charlie rubbed her nose on the tip of Joey's the pair had closed their eyes and savored the intensity and passion that still existed between them. Joey reached her arm around the back of Charlie's head and entwined her fingers through her hair and held on. Joey pulled back much to Charlie's shock and heartbreak.

"Joey!"

"Not here. Not yet." Charlie nodded and leaned into Joey's hand behind her head.

Joey began to massage Charlie's head causing her to moan slightly. Joey could feel herself tingling all over as Charlie enjoyed her head massage.

"Joey you need to stop or a kiss will not be the only thing I want to give you out here!" Joey stopped instantly and pulled her hand away. Charlie burst out laughing and leaned into whisper into Joey's ear. "So can I kiss you now or what?"

Joey smirked, stood up and ran off. Charlie didn't know what to do until she heard Joey shriek with laughter. Charlie realized that this was a catch me and kiss me game. She was not about to be out run by Joey again. The girls ran along the bay ducking in and out of boats running around people and cars recklessly and carefree. Charlie would every now and then manage to catch a piece of Joey's clothing but Joey would dive the other way or hit the ground meaning Charlie would keep running and let go. Joey was enjoying herself too much to stop running and let Charlie catch her. That was until Charlie stopped suddenly and fell to her knees. Charlie fell back on the sand and collapsed. Joey stopped and ran back screaming at Charlie. Joey fell to her knees and began checking Charlie then began mouth-to-mouth resuscitation until she felt her subject's arms fold around her and kiss her back. Joey tried to shriek in wild annoyance at being tricked but she couldn't help but allow Charlie to kiss her.

It was the most perfect kiss they had shared out in the open, where anyone could have seen them. Charlie wasn't trying to end the kiss or hide herself; she was just relishing being able to kiss Joey again. She wasn't being too hopeful; she knew a lot still needed to be discussed but to have this over her was amazing.

Joey pulled back first.

"So was it worth scaring the absolute life outta me for?" Charlie daren't open her eyes but nodded with a large grin. "Good, cause now I'm going to die from shock!"

"Oh good my turn to resuscitate you!" Charlie's eyes bounced open as Joey fell backwards laughing.

"I've never seen someone have a heart attack like this, but ok." Charlie chanced her luck with finding another kiss. Joey caught her face in her hands and held it there. "No, it doesn't work if I'm away up here you know!"

"Oh sorry." Joey held her there anyway. Her brief chat about Ruby floated back into her head. Charlie was a mother. That explained why Charlie did so much for her, over and beyond a sisters role.

"What are you thinking about?" Charlie asked quizzically.

"About you being Ruby's mum." Joey said softly. Charlie winced and turned to lie beside Joey on the ground. "Ok why did you make that face?" Charlie had by this time covered her face with her hands.

"Are you going to tell me that this changes things between us? That its unattractive or…"

"God Charlie no! Absolutely not if anything it tells me that your kids are beautiful and kind and smart and… Do you think that I would abandon you because you had a kid?"

Charlie sat up and smiled. She shook her head and then began picking away at the grass.

"Charlie I don't know what has happened but you are not you! What is wrong? Tell me please!" Charlie burst into tears instantly. "Come on you need to tell me…Otherwise I will walk away." Joey didn't mean this of course but she knew it would be the one thing that would make her talk. Charlie threw her arms around Joey.

"No, No, No, please, please you can't leave me Joey! I need you please stay with me or take Ruby and I with you!" Joey clung onto Charlie tighter and encouraged her to get to her feet.

Come on we need to sit and chat where we are at no risk of being overheard.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

Joey led Charlie up the road keeping her very close and gifting her an occasional kiss on the top of her head. This would soothe Charlie for a little while before the tears would flow again. Joey took Charlie back to the house Charlie shared with Leah and Ruby. Charlie sat at the table as Joey ran round checking no one was home. After the checks had been done Charlie and Joey went to Charlie's room and instantly Charlie froze. Brax must have been back to the house. His drawers had been opened and the laundry basket was full again.

"Joey we can't talk here."

"Why?"

"Brax is back."

"Oh, so…"

Charlie ran out and grabbed her keys again lifted her gym bag from the hall and dragged Joey with her.

"Where are we going?"

"Where we first stayed together, but we need to be quick I don't want him to follow."

Joey could hardly contain her excitement of getting back to the little hotel that they had spent their first night together. They raced to the car and Charlie was backing out of the drive when someone chapped the window. It was Ruby.

"So are you two talking again?" Ruby asked. The girls smiled at each other.

"Rubes I need you not to tell anyone we're gone. Ok you didn't see us. We won't be long, we just need to talk." Ruby promised and allowed Charlie to continue reversing.

When out on the road Charlie was frantically drumming the gear stick with her fingertips. She was nervous of something and Joey was praying it wasn't because of her. Joey reached out her hand and took Charlie's. Charlie gripped Joey and pulled her arm across to her side of the car and held Joey's arm close to her chest. Joey leaned over to make it more comfortable to accommodate Charlie's need to hold her hand.

They arrived at the hotel and Charlie and Joey jumped out of the car and raced to the reception. The young girl was eyeing them up as to why they needed a room so quickly. The pair moved down the hall and into their room. Charlie moved to the window and closed the blinds.

"Ok, so now are you going to tell me what this is all about?" Joey stood with her arms crossed over her body. Charlie was now scaring Joey.

"Firstly…" Charlie grabbed Joey. "Gotcha." And placed a kiss on her lips. "Secondly lets sit down first and get comfy."

"No, no getting comfy till you tell me why the people smuggling routine? Charlie you are scaring the hell out of me." Charlie stepped back and realized that she hadn't said a word the whole journey.

"Joey I'm so sorry. I'm just a little worried that's all."

"About what?"

"Being followed."

"Why? Because you don't want to be seen with a lesbian?" This angered Charlie.

"For the last time no! I was told less than 24 hours ago that… oh never mind." She stormed past Joey and tried to slam the door closed. Joey stopped it with her foot and forced her way in. Charlie kept her back to Joey until Joey spun her around and began kissing her passionately. Charlie couldn't believe what was happening but was thankful for Joey being there. They kissed and allowed each other to explore again. Tasting each other again was like reawakening the soul. Their hands were also becoming more explorative of each other. Charlie raised one of her legs and wrapped it round Joey to hold her body tighter to her. Joey pressed Charlie against the wall and began running her cold hands up Charlie's warm body. Charlie gasped every time Joey moved to another part of her body that hadn't become accustomed to her hands' temperature yet. Charlie pulled the band out of Joey's hair and ran her hand round to the back of her head and pulled tighter. Joey eased slightly as both were running out of breath. They were both heaving like mad as they allowed their foreheads to rest against each other.

"Ok you need to tell me now what you were told! I need to know what has scared you." Charlie began to shake her head and pulled Joey in so she could bury her head into her shoulder. Joey puled Charlie and walked her out of the bathroom. She encouraged Charlie to get into the bed and Joey lay beside her on top of the covers.

"Are you not getting in?" Charlie pleaded more than asked.

Joey half smiled and joined Charlie under the covers and instantly Charlie and Joey entwined like they had always done when they lay beside each other.

"Ok so talk." Charlie played with Joey's fingers trying to find where to start.

"Where do you want to start?"

"Where ever you want but the issue upsetting me most is what has scared you so much! Start there."

"I got a call yesterday to come into work. On my way to work I thought I had seen you, which I really had but I then convinced myself it was a hallucination after wishing for you that morning."

"You had wished for me that morning?"

"Yeah, if only I had tried it earlier!"

"Keep going!"

"So when I get to work I was escorted directly into the interview room and was in there for hours. My boss and his boss and other detectives from the city were in there grilling me. Calling me a liar, a cheat a thief an evidence fixer and more. It was awful, but it was all-true. I had lied to keep Brax out of jail and had fixed the evidence that placed him at a crime that would have ended him in jail. I am just so deep in this I don't know what to do and now the word is out that I have been talking about this and someone has been hanging around the house, following me and I'm not sure that its not Brax wanting to shut me up but I think it's the brother of the man that I killed when I was abducted."

"You think your capturers brother is after you? Have you told the police?"

"They aren't taking anything I'm saying seriously. Joey I have cried for you everyday. I have suffered everyday without you. You are the only happiness I have ever known. Brax was the bad boy that wouldn't go away and I was so lonely and then so deeply involved I couldn't see what I was doing. I need out and I don't know what to do."

"We will fight this together."

"Together!"

"Charlie I came back here for closure or something but I didn't figure for things to turn out like this. I still want to talk about that night and what you did. I had never felt so betrayed by someone. It was far worse that Brett throwing me out. Oh and I intend on paying him a visit after knocking you down."

"Joey that happened so long ago. Don't worry about that now. Just please don't leave."

"So what are we doing here? I'm not going to play second fiddle and I'm not going to wait. I waited long enough for you already. Either we try to work this out or we call it quits."

"I want you! Brax and I were over a long time ago I just was unsure what to do."

"And you are sure now?"

"Totally. As long as I have you and Ruby then I will always be happy. We can be a family. As long as that's what you want."

"Charlie ever since my mum died I wanted a family to call my own. I will love Ruby like she is mine but we still have to take this one step at a time. Wounds still need to heal."

"Do you think you will ever be able to forgive me?" Charlie asked unable to look her girlfriend in the eye.

"I wouldn't be here if I hadn't. Though I did need help with being able to forgive you. I had to end up going to see someone to talk it through. He was the one that encouraged me to make contact with me. I wasn't sure at first but thought that I'd give it a try. Then if it went wrong I'd have an excuse to stop going and paying so much money." Both laughed. "We need to get back and look after Ruby. If someone is out there looking you then they could turn on her."

Charlie jumped up and got out of the bed

"We need to go!" Joey and Charlie headed for the door and ran down the corridor.

The young girl at the counter looked at her watch as the girls dumped the keys on the counter and headed for the door.


End file.
